Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Need a Christmas Idea?

Well, it's been 2 months of sitting in my "broom closet" temporary office, as my British senior calls it.  They haven't even started working on our Center.  My request yesterday for a tentative start date was met with, "I don't know."

This morning I realized that on days I'm not feeling real cheerful as I head to work, I keep hitting "Play" on my Hugh Laurie blues CD, "Let Them Talk".

Yes, THAT Hugh Laurie.  Actor.  Comedy partner of Stephen Fry.  Dr. House.

Forget the "Song and Dance Man" label once attached to actors like Laurie who weren't just content to repeat the words in a script.  Inside that very British gent beats the heart of an old black man from New Orleans...one who understands the heartbeat of the Blues.  

I LOVE this CD!  (And yes, I almost said album, but most of you would've merely nodded).  I realized why this morning.  

I was singing along with a song which has a repeating lyric of, "Baby you don't know, you don't know my mind. When you see me laughing, I'm laughing just to keep from crying."

Sounds sad?  Well, it IS the Blues.  But then I found myself gleefully singing along, "Sometimes I think my baby's too good to die. Sometimes I think she should be buried alive."

I laughed so hard I forgot to be cranky.  
Below is a musical clip of my favorite song, "St. James Infirmary."  There were some live versions of this, but the audience can get so rowdy you lose the reason I find this selection so wonderful.  The first 3 minutes are basically a piano solo by Laurie...then he swings into singing.  His style is a little unique, but that's part of the charm.  Truthfully, I've just about worn the first 3 minutes out!  Enjoy!

Update: if you'd like to see more, try here, which was a PBS documentary on the making of the album (there, I said it!) with performances....and one of the guest stars is Tom Jones!

Monday, November 28, 2011

Are You Safe?

With today being "Cyber Monday", I hope your home shopping experience doesn't involve pushing, shoving or pepper spray.  

And no,  I don't DO Black Friday...I didn't get my Mom's gene for that. Or the one for shoe shopping.

Have a good week y'all!

Thursday, November 24, 2011

Happy Thanksgiving Y'all!

Don't stuff yourselves and remember....

Monday, November 21, 2011

Dear Congressman: Buy a Dictionary

According to the polls, 91% of Americans are ticked off with Congress and their "Super Committee"'s failure thus far to do more than agree to disagree.  Okay, so it's Monday and I know better but I sent one of my Congressman a little e-mail this morning.  Why?  Because HE is on the Super-Duper-Need-a-Pooper-Scooper Committee.  I tried to catch his Aides attention with the subject title: "I still believe you CAN fix our economy!"

I know.  Subtle as a hammer.  Then I added:

"I appreciate and understand how difficult the task given to the "Super Committee".  What I don't understand is why COMPROMISE never appears to be part of the vocabulary during these discussions.  For once, will all of you kindly forget which "team" you're on and and pull for ALL of us...the American people?    That's what Americans are truly angry about at this stage: the needs of individual parties being put above doing the right thing, for the right reason, for the American people.  It's simple: you don't spend money you don't have. No, really.  It's just that simple.  Attempting to reach into taxpayer pockets for more in light of a perceived unwillingness to cut what's not necessary from the Budget will only raise the ire of the public.  As you work toward a conclusion, I think you need to know that most of us are rooting for you. All you need to do is focus outside Washington, D.C., to see that we're here.   Good luck and Godspeed."

I know.  Waste of time probably.  Hey, I figure it's better than an ulcer. And yes, I expect a "party line" reply in a couple of days, when this has grown into a new crisis.

In the meantime, I read a CNN column today that made me laugh.  If you want to read it in its entirety, go here.   Written by comedian Dean Obeidaliah the short version was this snippet:

"If the congressional "super committee" does not reach a deficit reduction deal by Wednesday's legally mandated deadline, 
I propose we take a page from the NBA owners and lock Congress out.

I'm serious. 
We, the taxpayers, are the owners of Congress 
and if Congress won't make a deal that helps our nation, 
then let's put a big padlock on the doors of the House and Senate -- 
or at least change the locks and not give them the keys."

I second that motion?  Anyone care to vote?

UPDATE: As predicted, the Super Committee gave up.  Hmmm, my Momma told me that Winners never quit and Quitters never win. Guess we know which camp those folks are in.  


Thursday, November 17, 2011

Friday 55

Survived both the Senior Citizens trip, as well as an overly friendly Pirate who MADE me have my picture taken...with him!  But since I didn't have to walk the plank, I managed a 55 word story.  Be sure to share yours with the g-man. 

“Had he been depressed?” Eli asked, staring at the body in the road.

Cousin Rocky told Joe it was a religious experience.”

“Crossing the road?”

Rocky told Joe to go toward the light.    
He was joking.   
But that’s what Joe did.   
Walked toward…headlights.”

“So THAT’S how raccoons get possums to cross first!”

Didn't Have to Walk the Plank

Survived the trip with the senior citizens to the beach and everyone had a great time.  Well, except the 2 ladies we left at the hotel because they'd misread when they were suppose to be downstairs to leave.  Oh, they were mad but soon realized that (a) the mistake was theirs (b) we'd waited as long as possible (c) we left their tickets with their own Personal Pirate at the front door to usher them in...just as the show started.  Although they missed being in the group photo, they didn't miss being strong armed by the Photography Pirate.  These folks take their characters VERY seriously and I wonder if pirate garb comes with attitude.  For as I tried to slip past Photography Pirate, who was about six foot four and looked like half an American football team's defensive line, he caught me.  Literally.

"And where do ye think you're going?" he bellowed at me in fluent pirate speak.

"Um, out of the way," I offered, pointing at one of my couples being photographed for personal pictures. "I'm the Director.  My job is to stay out of the way and avoid the camera," I smiled.

"No," he corrected, gazing down at me.  WAY down.  "We shoot everyone who comes in."

At this point, I'm wondering if he means with a camera or a blunderbuss.  Before I could ask, he threw a meaty arm around my shoulders and d-r-u-g me into place before the camera, with a hearty, "You'll have your picture with me!"

You ever try to argue with a human mountain who has you in a shoulder lock?

So I did that fake smile we all use when gritting our teeth.  


"Just one more for good measure," the lady pirate at the camera said.  

No flash!  

"Oops!  Let's try that again!" she called cheerfully.  


"Okay, you can let go now," lady pirate advised her co-worker.  

To which Photography Pirate, still cradling me in a steel grip, replied, "Ah, I kinda like holding onto the soft ones."  And there we stood, in grip lock.

I had two simultaneous thoughts.  I am not THAT much overweight (and you could lose a couple of pounds yourself, Dude) and was that sexual harassment or entertainment?  He winked and let me go.  I smiled a genuine smile (of relief) and walked to join the seniors... who wanted to know who my friend was.


While the 3 day trip was fun, we did have a scary moment on the way home.  They didn't want a bus, so we carpooled.  Since they ARE adults, some elected to go visit local relatives while others did sight seeing.  Four carloads returned home together, with me bringing up the rear to ensure no one made an incorrect turn.  Hairy moment came when I saw the blur of gray to my right and I realized a small speeding car was going to either cut in front of the senior driving in front of me, or hit me.  

Fortunately, the senior also saw the car and began slowing down: I'd already taken my foot off the gas pedal and was prepared to swing the opposite direction of him in order to avert a 3 car pile up.  This fool, and I'm being kind, overshot BOTH lanes of traffic he was trying to enter and proceeded to fishtail for longer than I thought possible.  How he didn't flip that car is a miracle.  Finally straightening out as we crept past, he went north in the SOUTH bound lane, gained control, then shot BACK across in front of us.  He wove in and out of traffic, then shot back off in the direction he'd originally come from.  

We stopped a couple of miles down the road as the group wanted a snack and I asked if everyone's pulse rate was back to normal.  One senior asked me what I had done when I saw him and I replied, "I was looking in my rear view mirror for blue lights.  I can't believe a cop wasn't behind him!"  We joked that we would go home and watch the news to see if any area banks had been robbed.  Either he had a death wish or was higher than a kite.

So everyone had a good time and they're already talking about going somewhere again in the spring. 

In the meantime,  my Guardian Angel has requested a vacation...from me.

Friday, November 11, 2011


To those who have served,
to those who serve still and
especially for those who paid the ultimate price...
a heartfelt

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Argh! It's been a Weird Week!

Five weeks of life in my closet of an office with no windows and STILL no work has begun on my Center.  But bottom of the barrel this week was going to the dentist for my 6 month cleaning, only to have him say, "Um, you've got trouble!"  Seems my lovely asthma medication (which I've been weaning off of anyway) is doing bad things to my teeth.  After they were all shiny clean, he filled one and I left with his words ringing in my ears, "You'll need a root canal and crown on the one beneath it."

Merry Christmas?  Happy New Year?  Nope...not getting that done until 2012..when I'm suppose to be on vacation?!

For those of you who don't care for hunting, please stick with me long enough to view Mother Nature at her weirdest moment of creativity.  I'll preface this with Hubby doesn't hunt for sport, we consume what he harvests.  Deer don't get huge around here, but the mature ones usually have antlers with 8 "points".  Hubby got one last week that had TWENTY!  Take a look...I swear it looks like tree limbs.  You should be able to click on the photo to enlarge it...middle photo is from a back angle.

If you tried counting and didn't reach 20, blame it on my photography. Sorry.  The little "devil horns" in the front kinda creeped me out.

Come Monday, I'll be outta here until Thursday.  Hoping for smooth sailing this week, I'm taking 16 senior citizens on a 3 day jaunt to the beach.  Ah the fun of carpooling in a caravan when a bus isn't available! In case you're wondering, this is a group I'll have to keep up WITH, not push around. You know the world has changed when you're giving seniors your cell phone  number to put in their cell phones in case of emergency.  My Grandmothers would never have been farther than yelling distance on a trip.
However, our first night has us dining here.  Can't wait to see how that turns out.  They don't give you silverware with dinner, you know.  You eat with your fingers and drink out of a glass jar.  Argh, me hearties!

So till we meet again, Mateys.  Just hope no one asks me to walk the plank.  It would break my Dentist's heart.

Thursday, November 3, 2011

Friday 55

Before I venture out to take 16 Sr. Citizens on a 3 day beach trip this Monday, here's my 55 words of the week.  Make sure you share yours with the g-man.


4 Georgia senior citizens charged with planned biotoxin attack

Mormons fight lily-white image

Amish beard cutting attacks: cult suspected

Hillary Clinton declares, “Castro needs to go”

Justin Beiber denies fathering child

Sam’s plan to save America was simple.
Reduce stupidity.

His first step involved shipping
Lindsay Lohan, Kim Kardashian and Ann Coulter
to Castro.