Wednesday, March 17, 2010

To The Rainbow's End

I asked for your help with a story I was doing for the Senior's newsletter about a Leprechaun's Pot 'O Gold. This is how it ended up. Thanks!

With the current economy, I wouldn’t be surprised to find folks following a rainbow in search of a pot of gold. The problem is, first you have to catch the Leprechaun, which isn’t an easy task. Considering how grumpy and tricky legend says these wee folk are, you might wish you hadn’t even tried. Then again, I’d be grumpy too if my job was to make tiny shoes for the Fairies while people were after me gold.

As St. Patrick’s Day approaches, I wondered what that pot of gold would be worth today. The idea seemed simple enough. Find a pot which appeared of the correct shape, determine how much it could hold, fill it with gold coins and determine the current price of gold.

The first problem I encountered was the size of the pot. Sure, it looks huge next to a Leprechaun. Then I remembered a leprechaun is only 3 feet tall. The cauldron of Shakespeare’s 3 witches suddenly shrunk to the size of a colonial cooking pot. So I turned to my Irish friends online, hoping they could translate legend to fact. Their help proved very enlightening. In fact, they were SO helpful, it killed my idea.

I love my friends, so I won’t name names. Besides, they could’ve gotten seriously injured falling out of their chairs laughing when I asked the question. My first friend’s reply even offered a way out of the mess I’d created. “I've never ever heard an Irish person even say the word 'leprechaun', or tell any stories about them. So, I think you're free to make it any size you want! Nobody will argue with you.”

Good start. Until another answer added controversy…with tongue firmly planted in cheek. “Of course there are Leprechaun's. I've seen them lots of in the musical "Finnegan’s Rainbow!”

The problem with legends is people only agree on about half of what you’ve heard: catch the leprechaun, get the gold. One even added a disturbing twist. “If you try to reach inside the pot o’ gold without first catching the leprechaun, the pot will shrink around your wrist and cut off your hand.” But then she added, “If you are lucky enough to catch the leprechaun, then the pot o’ gold is wider than the sky and deeper than the ocean.”

I hate math. That Sky-to-Ocean scale really complicates things.

Another pal offered, “I believe the pot of gold is bottomless...its contents are determined on an individual basis. So I can't really give you a number. You want a number, oh the pressure of a number. Maybe like a billion and beyond! I'll have to ask the Congress Budget accounting office first how much is left in the people's pot of gold.”

That made me laugh. Laughter is free. And IRS exempt.

Giving up, I stumbled upon a website which calculates the phrase “worth your weight in gold”. The average American man’s weight of 180 pounds is worth $2,853,309.78 in gold. Seems you’re better off with an average man than running after a grumpy leprechaun.

So enjoy your rainbows. At least they’re tax free.


savannah said...

great story, sugar! i know i was laughing. i like the ocean to sky ration....i wonder if there's a pot of gold nearby today! ;~D xoxox

steven said...

hope that's very clever writing!!!! there's a book somewhere in you isn't there!!! steven

Bill ~ {The Old Fart} said...

I enjoyed reading the outcome of your quest. Happy Saint Patrick's Day Hope.

Peggy said...


You are s good at telling a story.
I can see the Irish i you right here.
I can also see some of my eratic thinking,you can tell I was off my meds that evening, (I addressed my comment to Susan; OH geez!)
Happy Happy St Paddy's Day. Lass!

Anonymous said...

Wonderful read my friend. Happy St. Patrick's Day to you and your family :)

Titus said...

Happy St Patrick's Day!
Great from start to finish, and I learnt stuff too. Education and amusement - what on earth do you do for an encore?

Susan at Stony River said...

What a lovely twist at the end -- grabbing a good ol' average man has *got* to be easier than grabbing a leprechaun!

Happy Saint Patrick's Day!

Monkey Man said...

Fun post - I was actually in Finnegan's Rainbow in high school back in the stone age. Played that romantic lead guy and sang lots. But really wanted to be Ogg, the leprechaun, with his pot 'o gold.

hope said...

savannah, the only problem with that ocean to sky thing is that I bet the IRS has a scale to match. ;)

steven, if we could just figure out what kind of book is lurking in there, perhaps I could start a new career. :)

Bill...hope your day was fun as well!

Peggy, I have days like that so I didn't even notice you'd said middle name is that, so it went right along. :)

Thanks Thom! Um, did I mention we're doing a Hawaiian theme on March 30th? ;) I do have music but could use some new recipes.

Titus, in my spare time, I'm a junior level spy. Read more at the new post. :)

Susan, if only you could cash in without giving up the average man in the bargain. ;)

Monkey have stage presence too? No wonder I like you people.